The trouble with Patrick…

Today I wanted to chat about Reality TV. One of my favorite reality TV shows is the original classic, Survivor.

Survivor is fun because it is a show where the players have to be real, but not too real and also play the game strategically. The social game is as important as strength and strategy.

This season, one player has been so interesting to me from the beginning – Patrick!

Patrick was so predictable! As you can see from his picture, he is all Captivator. In the first few days, the tribe loved him. He was funny and charming and talked a lot so he was able to make people comfortable and open up. But, he didn’t know when to turn off his Captivator or at least tone it down.

You see, Captivators are very openhearted and like to be entertaining. How better to be entertaining than to be the center of attention especially when everyone else is feeling a little shy. Yet, when a Captivator can’t step out of the spotlight, when they need to be the center of attention all the time, when they forget to use their empathic abilities to see how much is too much – well then they become a liability, too talkative, too self-centered and well, annoying. Unfortunately, for the out of balance, Captivator, they can also be oblivious to how much they wear on the nerves of those around them. That’s what happened to poor Patrick!

Last week, he was voted out, despite the fact that he was good around camp and had strength to help the tribe win challenges. He just couldn’t cut it socially.

That’s the thing even in life, if we are unaware of how we present ourselves to others, if we are unaware of when to listen or what others need to participate and engage with us, then we can get voted out of our own reality TV show. We can lose relationships. We can lose clients. We cannot make sales, because we are not good at the social game.

If you don’t want to be like Patrick, then I have a couple of options for you. You can join us in the Social Brilliance FB Group where you can interact more with others and me, and of course, you can always take Masterful Connecting 101, our online self-study Facial Intelligence™ Introductory course to become a master at using faces to help you in your social interactions.

Yours,

Michelle

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